Beauty for Ashes (book)

Dear God,

I was reading a book, Beauty for ashes. It was a book of testimonies of women and specifically I placed myself about “worth the wait” pg90. It’s all about waiting patiently, seeking more of you and will surely blessed if you believe. I was thinking that I had quite -the same experienced with one of the women’s testimony there. Though I didn’t have a boyfriend-relationships experienced, I’ve fallen in love with a guy when I was in second yr college. (We were best friends) I got hurt so bad. Eventually, I moved on and I had noncommittal relationships (MU), twice but interestingly I was christian already that time.

I always ask You why did it happen. I waited for 6 yrs to finally know the answer. Thank You!

It seemed that I had a choice and You give me free will to choose. And I chose that, I know that You don’t want me to get hurt again so You are always making a way to pull me out in that kind of situation like “MU” thing.

I’m¬†really¬†sorry God,¬†if¬†I¬†didn’t¬†follow¬†and¬†obey¬†you most of the time and ¬†when I’m being stubborn¬†in¬†heart¬†and¬†in¬†mind.¬†Sorry¬†for¬†all¬†the¬†times¬†that¬†I¬†had “kilig” (butterflies in one’s stomach)¬†for¬†some guys that¬†I¬†shouldn’t,¬†because¬†I¬†know¬†now¬†exactly¬†that¬†Jesus¬†should¬†be¬†in¬†my¬†heart¬†and¬†He¬†should¬†be¬†the¬†one¬†that¬†makes¬†me¬†giggle,¬†blooming¬†or¬†in¬†love.¬†I¬†know¬†and¬†I¬†believe¬†that¬†you¬†will¬†give¬†me,¬†my¬†prince¬†that¬†has¬†a¬†heart¬†of¬†yours,¬†who¬†really¬†loves¬†you¬†more¬†than¬†he¬†loves¬†me.¬†Papa¬†God,¬†please¬†help¬†to¬†focus¬†on¬†Jesus¬†and¬†please¬†make¬†my¬†path¬†straight¬†and¬†put some people¬†who¬†will¬†surely¬†guide¬†me¬†especially¬†in¬†this¬†love¬†relationship¬†thing¬†that¬†soon¬†a¬†testimony¬†for¬†everyone.¬†I¬†ask¬†for¬†your¬†abundant¬†grace¬†to¬†wait¬†patiently¬†and¬†happily¬†for¬†the¬†one¬†you¬†will¬†give. Help me to enjoy this season. Thank¬†you for¬†you¬†know¬†the¬†desires¬†of¬†my¬†heart,¬†because¬†it¬†is¬†You,¬†who¬†gave¬†that¬†desires.¬†In¬†Jesus¬†name.¬†Amen!

I learned that even if you’re christian already or having a relationship with Jesus, you might fall into temptations that you’ll go in wrong directions if you’re¬†out of focus. He maybe used this experienced of mine as a testimony that¬†I can always START A NEW!

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